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I’m freakin’ Superman in my spare time….

July 2, 2013 - Author: Ordinary Girl

I absolutely love being a stay at home mom and my husband works very hard to make that happen. It was a decision we made together. It ended up working out too while I was so sick. We don’t have a whole lot of extras but we have a pretty decent life. I’ve had much less for the vast majority of my life and so I count the blessings rather than complain about what isn’t perfect here. I have been seeing a new specialist that has made the most progress with my diagnosis and my medications. I have been 5 months without an episode. However my husband and I were talking about it the other night and we also believe that it had something to do with the amount of stress and anxiety that his boys had put us through. The timing just kind of works out that way and so it makes us wonder. The last time I went this long it was when I went to KS and we were separated and it was 4 months.

Since stress is the major activator of my issue it makes sense. Now they are all gone and not helping or even speaking to us. OrdinaryDad, the kids and I have all been pulling double time to keep up with everything. Funny thing is, even though it is stressful, it is getting done and better than when they were around and the extra stress is not causing me any issues. If anything I am working harder and healthier than I have been able to in a long time.

It’s OrdinaryDad who is suffering more than I and I think that is because all my energy is channeled into helping support him and making sure he is okay. Doesn’t matter what they say or do towards me, I haven’t cared what others have thought for a very long time. I’ve dealt with crazy family and drama my whole life and nothing they have done, could do or think of doing would knock me down because I HAVE survived the worst of the worst. It has made me strong and it has made me a fighter. And when I am in fight mode, I don’t have time to worry about my hurt little feelings or even if I do have any. Which is why I’m titled a bitch.Strong women who speak their mind and stand their ground loudly aren’t really appreciate around here. Especially in the South. They are more into the subtle Southern F-you. The one where they tell you to go to hell and you look forward to the trip before figuring out you have been insulted – and usually not till much later.

So between juggling the house and all the things that go with that, the kids and dinner and all the animals etc I am also holding together the strong person who usually helps hold me. Revamping plans for the family business, taking up the slack, stepping up and running some of the other things going on that we keep private from my blog, running this blog and my fan page, which thanks to all you wonderful people is starting to take off. I am also working on a short piece as well as perhaps a book, with the encouragement of a fellow author, blogger and friend.

Yes I have my moments of frustration, upset or resentment but in the end I love my life and chose it for a reason and I will be dammed if anything is going to take that away or otherwise mess with it.

They read this blog avidly. They can’t help themselves. They look for any little crack, any little detail they could possibly use. They blow things out of proportion or flat out lie (yes we have had to defend ourselves in court from the neighbors more than once) and so instead of taking a defensive position we are all offense baby. Starting to take care of our lives as if these people no longer exist. There was a hollow look in his eyes when he told me that his boys no longer existed to him, they have crossed the line and done too much; there is no going back now. And despite all the hurt they caused me it distressed me to hear that. I know all you parents out there are all like “No matter what my kid ever did to me I would never stop loving them or disown them” – well guess what. I was in your shoes too. Still kind of feel that way about it because I trust my kids won’t repeat this disaster. But I do know the possibility exists. And I totally understand why he feels that way. Until you have had your own flesh and blood betray you, lie about you, use you, manipulate you, try to destroy your marriage and then say “you made your bed I hope you die in it” (yes that is a direct quote from Mr. BBP to his dad via text last night) ~ then please don’t come in here throwing darts because he said that.

He means it now and I stand by him, but if he changed his mind in the future because they grew up or realized the truth I would still support his reconnecting with them. But he feels they burned a bridge and it is done at the moment. Do you blame him? His son also flung this blog in his face saying “You still haven’t read her blog and you take her side against us”. Let me speak very slowly and clearly for you ASSHOLEdon't be an asshole.







Listen closely.

I.perfect I dont' care

You are so wrong here it isn’t even funny. Your dad is wondering if you have lost your ever loving mind. You not only threatened his client relationship and challenged they would pick you over him, saying he couldn’t do a damn thing about it (as if he was even going to or is even like that dummy) but on top of that, you wished him to die. A direct threat against him. I wouldn’t push your luck any further. Karma is a bitch and I promise if you follow the neighbors path and papaw’s path – it won’t play out like you think it will.entitlement

And just an FYI – YOU are the only one who flunked out of school Mr. BBP. I was nearly killed in an auto accident my first round and my second round I chose raising my kid over finishing school at that time. I’ve never flunked out like you did. And in a matter of a year or so, I can have my masters degree – you don’t have shit. Have a nice life.

Keep reading me, keep hating me ~ it affects my life not at all. We will press on, be successful, shake the dust of all this bullshit off our shoes and raise our family together. You chose not to be a part of that. YOU chose to write yourself out of your father’s story. And YOU chose the enemy over him not the other way around. My friends and fans stand by me and so does OrdinaryDad as well as my kids both adopted and blood. So keep it up, nothing you do matter to us. I have my happiness and place to be at home, you threw yours away.

   pocket full of fucks

See my friends, I try to speak about other topics and they just refuse to give me breathing space. Thanks for being there for the journey both good and bad. Until we meet again, stay safe and be blessed.


Comments are closed - Categories: Love is a Battlefield, My Step Nightmare, Parenting stories - Trench Warfare, Play the Hand

Sending Heaven A Message ~ Too Much Sadness Today

June 16, 2013 - Author: Ordinary Girl

Today is Father’s Day and for some of us, it is a hard day. We don’t have fathers who are with us, for whatever that reason may be. My father has passed and I have friends and family who will have a hard time today as well because they are missing their fathers too.

dear father

…..however mine is colored with regret for not ever having a real father in my life. I’m sure some of you can share that feeling as well.

I started the weird tradition in my family (when I became a single parent myself and understood all that my mother had to deal with) of calling her and wishing her a Happy Father’s Day. By then I knew what it took to be both parents to my two children. I have a son and a daughter so I see the need from both sides for a father in a child’s life.

I figured if she did the job of both, shouldn’t she get the credit too? When my sisters wound up in the same boat, they, as well as any of my single parent friends also get my calls/text/wishes on those holidays.And yes, I do wish my single father’s a Happy Mother’s Day as well. I simply admire anyone who takes a stacked deck and actually parents with it.


I try to focus on this day on the fact that I have a wonderful man in my children’s lives and that they won’t miss out on having someone in their lives like I did. But on this day they also hurt because they remember their dad isn’t here. My son because he remembers, my daughter because she can’t.

My husband went to town yesterday to run errands for guy stuff like Tractor Supply for dog food and parts for our John Deere Mower you know, guys junk. And my son went along for the ride. I’ll tell ya, he came back feeling 10ft tall because he got to go. My husband is no slouch when it comes to parenting. When he married his ex she had two kids, then they had three and when we got married I had two. So in all, he has been through 7 kids. I think he may have picked up a tip or two.

He has been there for everything over the last 7 years. He was there when my daughter got potty trained, when my son rode his first two-wheeled bike and then my daughter as well. He has been there through all the bad stuff too, like the day we almost lost two of our kids to a wicked car accident or the day we had to tell mine their daddy was gone. He was there, being a rock, a great man, a great father, a best friend. He will be there for their future things like graduation, getting married, having children; and I think that I couldn’t have asked for a better person in their lives. eternal calling

Today my heart breaks for OrdinaryDad. He is feeling it especially hard after Mr. BBP paid him and unpleasant visit. The little shitbird came up, dropped off the money for this phone – two days late ($60/mo), took the rest of his stuff, lipped off to his dad, accused him of kicking him out (still not admitting to the failing college and taking off and lying), tried to take his dog down to the neighbor’s house (and accused me of potentially doing something to her), lipped off some more, said he didn’t care about lying and using our client to do so, fucker actually shrugged. Funny thing is that he and I barely fought compared to his twin and when his twin left he bailed on HIS dog too and Chaos is thriving. Hell Sable sleeps with US now at night. She hasn’t really acted as bad as we thought she might.

On his way out the door I said “Nice Father’s Day, asshole”.  and he turned around and told me to go fuck myself which it totally fine, I laughed in his face. Then he proceeded to lip off some more to his dad on the front porch while OD had to make sure he didn’t steal Sable. Keeps saying it doesn’t matter, that he “can’t afford school” even though he is/was getting way more money this coming semester than he had first round. There is something seriously wrong with that boy. He has finally snapped like we worried he would, and it is just as ugly as we thought. He didn’t even try to come up here nice, he hit the door with a bad attitude. He was looking for a fight.

OD had to tell him he wasn’t taking the dog anywhere until he could prove he had a place to live with him and her. Claims he is finding something in town that will allow a pet….really? Umm I have looked for places to live many, many times in my life and good luck finding something. You really have no clue. And if you do, the deposit is a nice chunk of change.

My husband’s heart leapt in his chest when Mr. BBP sent the Happy Father’s Day text and asked if he could come up. He was so excited to hear from and get to see one of his boys today and now he is broken hearted again and I am angry on his behalf. But he will sit there bleeding from his wounds, drop by drop and just keep taking the slashes. He doesn’t stand up for himself let alone lash out and I’m curious if I will feel the same way if my kids act like jerks when they get older. Because I say right now I don’t care who you are, you are expected to treat me with the same respect I give you, and for that matter, if you push too hard, expect me to push back period.

This sucks so hard because I can’t help him other than be there to hold him together when he falls apart and yes he cries, I can only imagine how it hurts him to see what all the scars they carried have done to them and their choices. It hurts to watch a son have it all and let it go and to not even have the courtesy of giving his dad an explanation to understand it all. It hurts him to watch them live a lie and believe that lie and use that lie as a weapon against him. But he loves them enough to take it, he loves them enough to leave the door open, he loves them enough to love them even when they throw it in his face and I can’t help but admire him for it.

This is an exceptional man, and I am honored to share his life. Please send your thoughts and prayers to him. I’ll stand strong while he can’t because he never fails to stand strong for his family.

Appreciate what you have my friends. Please tell your loved ones how you feel and don’t let petty things stand in the way. Some day you might look back and it will be too late.

Until next time my friends, stay safe and be blessed.

to have a child

Comments are closed - Categories: Father's Day

Dude, Bail? I think bail………..bail. Yep, bail.

June 3, 2013 - Author: Ordinary Girl

Dear Spoiled-Ass Teenage Jerk-off:

You thought “you could come and go as you please” because you interpreted us saying we would treat you like an adult when you turned 18 to mean free license to act a fool. Let me translate a few things for you.

Having freedom to choose when and where you go is totally different than having 100% freedom to come and go as you please. You cannot come home at 3-4 am or whenever, simply because, no matter how you now choose to live your life, we have business to handle. We are still going to work, paying bills and taking care of younger kids. We cannot be woken at any time of the middle of the night you decide to stroll in because we have to actually sleep and be responsible. Remember the dogs will bark their asses off and so there is no coming in silently, not to mention we hear the vehicles. It is part of respecting whatever household you are in. Trust me, if you worked a third shift job and people were louder than hell when you were trying to sleep you would be the FIRST to lose your mind and temper. It also doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t at least ball park the who, what, when and where so that if something happens, we know how to get a hold of you and when-ish to expect you in case, God forbid, you were in an accident. It has happened before and it almost killed you and Alex so why the hell would you turning one year older change us worrying about your safety? You say you will be home or we expect you and then you don’t show – we worry. Oh my God we are TERRIBLE parents. Get a fucking! And to top it off, you expect us to tell you every single detail of our lives and reasoning but feel like you shouldn’t have to tell us anything.

Paying for your own car insurance and gas is not special, it is NORMAL. You are not helping out the family by doing this. You are preventing YOUR issue from becoming ours by handling it, and let me remind you we carried your ass for a LONG time when you couldn’t get it together AND paid for your gas; now you are merely handling what you should have been doing since 16. You are 3 years late and much too ungrateful.

You treat the house like it is the college buffet. There is nothing wrong with you wiping out 6 pieces of fish or 8 eggs in the morning (in one sitting) for example and then you ask us how dare we hint you should have been helping out with a bill or the food since you were working. If you HAD been doing these things, you might have a legitimate argument, but you weren’t even close, you want to blow all your money on BS with your friends. And accuse your dad of mistreating you to ask you this at the age of 19. Like it was the same as his parents making him pay for his own room as the oldest since he was 15.

You can say you were gonna all you want and the fact is that in life, actions will always speak louder than words. Not ONCE have we been able to go out to dinner or on a date. Not even once in a blue moon because your fun is top priority. Not once did you offer to help your dad by doing things you know needed to be done. Nope, you would add to his list by breaking shit then never even attempting to fix them, let alone pay for them. You did not want to handle your ONE chore in this house – and couldn’t even change a bathroom trash can, you were not around to take care of your dog – she was never walked, had to beg you to go out, even peed on your bed because you barely bothered. You refused to help out any extra and bitched about the little you did, didn’t bother with your father’s birthday or Father’s Day ever unless I reminded you, let alone care about holidays or birthdays for anyone but yourself. This is not being a loving, good son; no matter how smart ass you say it to your dad.

You were not the babysitter, you have been asked ONCE recently and that was to make a trip out to Nashville to see the specialist, and all you had to do was get them off the bus and feed them and put them to bed. OMG so fucking hard. You are so put upon. You aren’t a man, you aren’t even close. A real man cares about his family, a real man pulls his share and more if someone can’t, a real man thinks about someone other than himself, a real man admits his mistakes and seeks to better himself. You are a wanna-be, nothing more. You know it and most people know it. You would be surprised how many people have stopped me since hearing what you did to say how stupid you are and what an asshole you act like when you aren’t here. I sure hope someone knocks that chip off your shoulder soon or you are in a world of trouble. That anger you hoard is gonna spill over and it is going to be ugly.

You have literally been out nearly every night with your buddies this semester. You had all the freedom you could desire and the support both financial and emotional you could have desired. Good luck on your own out there. The world is gonna take a bite out of you. You are too stubborn and arrogant to last long without it happening.

Oh and your sick, fucked in the head accusations about Sable and us “doing something” to her just show me how disturbed you really are. Chaos is just fine and actually doing better now than he was before he got left.  Dad doesn’t want to see you or talk to you right now because he is so hurt and for that reason alone I can’t vouch for the reception you will get from me.



P.S. Fuck you. Karma will be there soon.

I said it

Sorry friends, this too shall pass. Stay safe and be blessed. I pray that your families are at peace and that ours will find peace soon.


Comments are closed - Categories: Did I Really Say That Out Loud?, Last Word Letters

For All the Haters….

March 21, 2013 - Author: Ordinary Girl

all the shit you put me thruI love how people take a honestly reflective blog and try to beat someone with it. Problem is, if I’m putting it out here, it isn’t anything that is able to be used against me as a weapon. I’m not stupid folks, and if you think that by me admitting I was wrong or weakness here means I’ve failed or some such nonsense, you are once again mistaken. I am stronger for the things I learn. If you never fall, you never grow. The last several years have been full of lies and manipulations yes, but they have been so happy too. Self-pity, for those who don’t know, involves someone living a warped version of the truth because they are unwilling to admit the kinds of things I do here. The emotions that run us are only powerful if they were to remain unspoken and left to be sulked about. Instead I take it, put it here and let it go. I’ve helped a LOT of people over the years both here and other places. If you don’t like it or want to judge then you are absolutely free to do so.

If you cannot see the swings up and down then it is YOU I pity. Because to truly have a family means going through the good and the bad with them. And to say that there is never any bad would be a damn lie if anyone said it. You can have a regular family, a single parent family or a blended family – it doesn’t matter. I don’t attack, I put out the truth; good, bad, mine and theirs. They each know and have always known about this blog. If you haven’t realized that it hangs off our personally owned website, well then you know now. Keep reading, keep hating because you are a mere ripple on the outside edges of my life and matter very little.

We will cull those that keep trying to drag us down and destroy our marriage and family – you are no longer welcome here. In fact each and every person verbally severed familial ties after this last debacle. You crushed the last hope D had that you had grown up and were willing to admit your part in this story. Like the $5K you blew at Cumberlands and ran off to AZ and the Army instead. We haven’t demanded payment in court like the rest of the crazy family likes to do, or maybe you would prefer we acted like them? Cuz if we are so bad and they are so good, we should copy their actions right?

It’s always hard to be the one standing trying to explain until suddenly you realize you could talk till you were blue in the face and yet the other person will just keep on believing their lie. And even more suddenly you realize that you don’t care, that lie has no power to affect you again. The truth will win out and I will keep on taking care of my family. You lose, you fail to affect us now or ever again. Have a nice life.

biggest mistake

P.S. there is NO fair in fight when it come down to it now. You have pushed way too far over the line. D wants you to know this!!

Sorry for the interruption my friends, until next time, stay safe and be blessed.




Comments are closed - Categories: Did I Really Say That Out Loud?

Banjo Music In Our Own Backyard…….the Backlash (Part 3)

December 29, 2011 - Author: Ordinary Girl

Since the October 26th incident where we both confronted Bobby to his face, things have spiraled out of control. He had not been able to bully/scare my husband the day he came over and stuck a gun in his face on our front porch. I did not back down when he threatened me in his driveway. Then we had the ‘audacity’ to call the police and report it…….Do you not know he is the fucking KING of this valley and won’t tolerate any disrespect? Psssshhhhhh!

Not scary, but insulting nonetheless - who in their right mind does things like this?

Bobby has always been a bully. He bullied Dennis when they were kids. Now that the playing ground is level, and everyone is all grown up, he doesn’t like it, so they resort to dirty pool. They hung a new decoration on their fence the week before court. Get this people….a NOOSE. Yep, that is right. Because we have had the audacity (and heard about it afterwards on the gossip chain) to have friends up here who happen to be black. Worse yet, his wife is *gasp* white. OMG!! These people have serious issues guys. Instead of letting us know they saw the kids riding a bit too fast on the quad, they called Dennis’ father and told on them to him. They didn’t walk over here, they didn’t call, they tattled. He doesn’t live here, lives down the mountain and two towns over. Both they and Clarence keep exchanging calls when they should have been dealing with us in the first place. Then he nags Dennis over things and doesn’t even realize that they aren’t true. He just assumes they are. And Bobby and Dean don’t have any issues with their grandkids tearing up that same strip of road in front of the houses on their dirt bikes, quads and motorcycles. The back and forth went from bad to worse. They watched every move we made, and went out of their way to be jerks. Every weekend, they ride those loud things or shoot for hours on end. We rolled our eyes and ignored them, turned the proverbial cheek for years. Not once did it cross our minds to press any charges or involve the law. They were just assholes plain and simple. To be ignored.

They did not feel the same. They had to see something happen. How dare we not cow to them. On November 18th my husband was driving home with his son Aley. They came upon a car that was driving incredibly erratically and since this is tourist haven, they figured it was a drunk driver. Rather than continue to be stuck behind someone like that in the dark, (just at/after twilight) they passed (even though it is solid yellow all the way through the mountain) it was safer than worrying they would wreck and then cause them to wreck. Besides, it was a straight stretch, you could have seen the lights; someone would have to be driving in the dark, in the woods with no lights for there to be an accident. We haven’t had good stories on these roads either. They pulled away from the driver only to have them speed up on their tail, with their bright lights blaring. It kept on until he was held up on the next level of the road when you cross the bridge. It heads up the mountain and has several steep 25mph curves. Some slow erratic driver was in front of him now and he was pinned with the bright lights in his rear view. As they rounded the last few curves to the house he decided he didn’t want to lead this crazy fucker to our house so he stops and gets out. Turns out the car that had passed them pulling onto the mountain road was Dean. He asks her to turn off her brights and she tells him to get back in the car. He says he will when she turns off the lights. She does, he does, they go home. End of story. Well except the slow driver was the 13 year old girl being allowed by her mother to drive up the mountain in the dark.

Five days later a Sheriff shows up on our porch around seven-ish. Dennis was served with a warrant. Apparently when they reported it to the police initially the idea happened. When the sheriff showed up then, Dennis didn’t say anything other than he passed her and there was no yelling or cursing like she claimed. The cop even tried the good ol’ I know it was this truck and Dennis was like Okay……  The cop took the report but when he went back to Bobby and Dean, he informed them what they could do. They went down to the courthouse and on their word alone, pressed charges for reckless endangerment and dogs at large. Dennis would have been arrested on the spot had he not signed the papers, though they didn’t tell us that at the time, we read it in the fine print. We felt we had nothing to hide, and had done nothing wrong so he signed it but we were like seriously? Then the sledgehammer dropped. He had ten days to turn himself in for booking. Yes, my husband, the small business owner, father of five, ex military, ex Department of Corrections. No court. No jury. No nothing other than a pissed off false claim from a neighborhood bully. To serve and protect my ass!!

neighbors new fence decoration

So Christmas is coming up fast, and the court date is on December 14th.We get to look at things like this, all the while being super vigilant of EVERYTHING because we don’t want to give them anything. I documented all the history, took pictures of everything and got ready. Every noise makes us jump, every engine makes us check the windows and doors. It isn’t fun.

First thing we do is find an attorney in the neighboring county. Turns out he is familiar with this area and I quote “I wouldn’t take it [the county], if you gave me a crown and said your the fucking king of P- County”. Even knew the bitchy dark haired girl by name who features in the story later. I just gave the description as a rude dark haired girl and he spouted her name off.  We suspected that was who it was. Another ally for Bobby and Dean, people down here are very clannish and tend to believe gossip without checking for themselves. We met only a few brief times with him but I had already compiled a long list of what had been going on, the fact that Bobby had a criminal record, the history of animal cruelty, the gossip, and all of it. Of course the previous report was of no use to us having been done by a young man who was friends with the oldest of Dennis’ boys. He bungled it and didn’t fill out the whole story just the dogs part, not the weapon part. Then it dawned on me that they would have to have transcripts of the 911 call. They better do it quick though I said because crazy man’s son’s wife is the dispatcher. The lawyer noted that, and we never heard, but the judge apologized to our attorney to us for how rude and short he was.He told us at our second meeting before court.

We went in to the justice center the day after seeing our attorney, at his advice, to get a restraining order till court. That is where the rude fat bitch comes in. She tries to refuse us. Starts whispering “that’s him” and says “charges pending” and the other woman came back to ask for more information. They tell us we can come back in two days or they can fax it over to the judge, wait for his decision, and then he can fax it back. She advises us it might be faster to do it in court Wednesday. So we agree but the bitch butts in again and says why don’t you just wait a week and a half for court and do it then. I couldn’t hold back any more. I leaned in the window and said tightly, through clenched teeth “because my children are being threatened with guns that is why”. The other woman who was helping us looked a little shocked and shot a glare at the bitch leading me to believe that as usual in an office of women, they don’t like her very much. She was pissed and glared at me, while I glared her down in return. I stated loudly we would be in court Wednesday for the Order of Protection and we left. Well I left and Dennis followed me. See, that is why I’m a bitch, I stand up for us. *rolls eyes*

So the bitch gets back at us by secretly moving up our court date. When we show up for the R.O. we realize he thinks we are here over the alleged charges. We inform him we have an attorney and he gets real snotty saying “Well he is supposed to file a notice of representation, and if he can’t follow the rules of the court…”  To no avail we kept trying to explain what happened all the while that dark haired devil is smirking. When we leave, we go straight to the office and set up another appointment. At the second appointment we tell him about the son’s wife being the dispatcher, what the devil had done, as well as what the judge had said. Then it was on. We were not really informed of much, but he took total charge on our court date.

Dennis had to endure the booking process and yet they didn’t take it seriously. They noted no details about him other than the fingerprinting and the pictures. They even warned him this ‘National Enquirer” style paper would publish his picture and the alleged charges unless we PAID them not to. Now he was fuming even more. He kept his cool and I am so proud of him. It was humiliating for someone who has always tried to work hard, do right and take care of his family. His freedom was stripped with a simple word from someone else. So we waited.

Court finally came and the attorney was late because a heavy fog settled over the whole area. He came in and assured us things were fine. We went into court and he did as well. After doing the usual attorney meet and greet up there, he handles a few smaller cases he has and then moves onto us. We talk with him briefly after he speaks with the DA and then he calls Bobby and Dean aside. He basically tells them we are denying all the charges and were more than willing to take it to trial. He would pull it over to Bradley county if anything else happened, but otherwise we were willing to do the mutual Order of Protection and drop it. They were pissed. He came back and told us what was going on and then we saw the judge. The judge blustered here and there about slapping someone in jail – but we knew it was all idle threat now. They had nothing. He knew, our attorney knew, they knew and we knew. The case was continued for six months. If all stays quiet, it drops with nothing on record. If anything happens we go to court.

Our attorney volunteers to draw up the mutual P.O. and then loudly ask them if they feel they can be in the same room for a little bit. LMAO. I was enjoying some Karmic justice. Once we got into the room, we were all just about elbow to elbow in this tiny room. Our attorney was as gracious as could be but threw out plenty of loaded barbs. He made fun of her name saying someone didn’t do you any favors; her name is Hazel LaDene. She was pretty huffy about that. Then he asked if they wanted to include the kids, when they did he said what a shame to throw kids into squabbles especially around the holidays. Now it was Bobby’s turn to squirm. He made it known that if EITHER side broke this order, that they would be in trouble. Not just us, them as well. Everything got wrapped up and we couldn’t help but smirk a little that their plans had unraveled in their face. They never expected us to get an attorney, to have our information organized, to have pictures and actual intelligence to build a case. They never thought beyond trying to get us in trouble. We fought back. Now we wait. Now we just ………….wait. This waiting is killing me. Just wait till the cameras and security light go up, muahahahaha………..

(to be continued, the wrap up – thoughts and feelings)


Comments are closed - Categories: Bad Neighbors, Banjo Music in Our Backyard, Fight or Flight, Fingerprint Friday

Banjo Music In Our Own Backyard…….the Beginnings. (Part 2)

December 26, 2011 - Author: Ordinary Girl

I hear banjo music.......

We have made peaceful overtures to all three of our immediate neighbors.We have kept them updated on predators in the area (since we live in the national forest). Shut doors when the storms blew them open. We have brought homemade jelly over more than once. They even helped us when our dog got snake-bit a few years ago. We have complimented one another on the upgrades to our respective houses and such, as well as them letting us know what a good weedkiller was for our newly graveled driveway. Our boys used to mow the lawn of the lady behind us every week, not to mention clean all the trash when her dog ripped it up. We still do her bank for free because she won’t take care of it and we have a big problem with copperheads and water moccasins. It’s a safety issue. The crazy man’s grandson has been bitten before.

Each situation has gotten worse as the gossip spreads to all of a sudden painting us as if we are evil, terrible neighbors. Their family (of the crazy guy) finally conspired to keep our land deed from us, until the woman who used to live next to us (also related) sold her land illegally to the ‘good’ neighbors there now. They had no right to sell because there is no well on that property and we were not allowed to have the deed because they had some preexisting water right arrangement they didn’t want to have to deal with us over. This is the same woman who hides her money in her son’s bank account so she can collect SS benefits as well as food stamps even though she doesn’t need them. Well we could have legally cut them off our well and we haven’t. We pay their electricity every month and the one time the well broke, we peacefully split the cost.

The woman behind us has kids around the same age as ours. We have warned her about the feral hogs and coyotes due to her small dog being free 24-7 outside. We have seen her allowing Alex and Ean to play at their little bonfires, the kids have been on both sides of the branch that separates our property. Well we started noticing her kids age 12, 10 and 7 were left home alone everyday after school as well as on breaks. It went on for a long time and we spent a lot of time being extra vigilant and making sure nothing bad went down. We are 45 minutes from a hospital and 30 minutes from any police assistance. It was fine until this 12 year old girl starts to bully Alexandria on the bus, badly. Alex isn’t scared of anything and this girl had her backed into a figurative corner. It spilled over one day with this girl shouting taunts and threats while Alex was in her own yard. After being told by me several times to leave my daughter alone, this girl turned her verbal abuse on me using words I would spank my 11 year old son for. I called my husband and we decided since her mother was not home the best thing would be to have a peace officer intervene. The woman showed up after the police did and the young girl became so belligerent in front of the officers they told her to shut up. I danced all around the issue till the woman flat out said I just got home – which led to her leaving them unsupervised, and a DHS call. She has one previous report and a new one about her letting her now 13 year old drive up the dangerous, windy mountain roads – once in the day and once at night. She made the kids stop being friends and we haven’t spoken to them since. We run into them occasionally and they make fools out of themselves going “out of the way” to ‘avoid’ us. We shrug it off but it left her with a bone to pick. She decided to team up with the assholes across the road. They don’t care that her dog runs free 24-7 – it just HAS to be ours, ya know, the ones that aren’t ever out alone? They provided her with No Trespassing signs so there is a two sided ring around us of bright red signs. (CLICK on each picture to see up close)






this is taken from our front porch of "crazy guy's house"

one behind the tree and one behind the bush on either side of their branch


Now back to all the gossip.The more the line was drawn with Clarence (Dennis’ father) the worse the gossip got. We have tried to resolve this several times with him, even spoken to him in person. He refuses to be reasonable. He sold his grandson’s jeep behind his back just because he is angry with us. People we don’t even know tell us about the crap he talks in public. We always brush them off with a laugh about him being a crabby old man. We made constant overtures of friendliness that were rebuffed. Then there was a mysterious recent call to DHS which coincided with details only Cody would know…stories when taken out of context look bad, but were proven completely baseless. However it led to four major intrusions and a complete disruption of our lives. Almost to the breaking point of our family. Three of four kids are now in counseling.

When Dennis was trying desperately to preserve a relationship with his dad he constantly faced open rude criticism of me and my kids. What was a pleasant daily ritual of morning coffee and chatting, was turned into increased the pressure and unhappiness for my husband so he stopped going over as much. I was blamed of course. Clarence talked about what a user I was, how I was just looking for a dad for my kids (who by the way still had a father at the time), after all the grief that there was “something wrong with my kid’s heads”, I was a bitch who wasn’t welcome at his house. I could keep going but what is the point? He didn’t like that I wouldn’t allow him to continue to use and abuse this family. I became the enemy and he spends every week telling crazy man’s wife, Dean, that and more. They feel as though they have to ‘pay us back’ on his behalf or some screwed up crap. Even though our old neighbors from down there let us know if something goes wrong with him, like when he has fallen and we rush down to help even if we aren’t wanted. Now we just call his daughter in Hawaii and she checks on him. He hasn’t wanted anything to do with anyone but Cody and the twins know that. It has always bothered them.

The major blowup point came on October 26th. My kids were in and out of the house that day playing. They let me know that there was a white pit bull running around free. The dog belongs to crazy man’s son who lives on some land in the back of their property. This particular incident happened when my 11 year old son took our lab out. She seeing the dog sitting on our front porch, immediately chases it. When she gets into the neighbor’s yard, with Ean in hot pursuit. Crazy man sees them, runs for the house, gets a gun and comes back out yelling threats about killing the dog at my son’s quickly retreating back. First rule of conflict resolution, speak with the person. I went over to talk with crazy man and he blew up in my face threatening to “hurt me if I didn’t get off his property”. He got nose to nose with me and I saw his wife’s face (100 yards or so away) – she had a look of fear in her eyes though she was yelling at me. He wanted to hit me, I could see it in his eyes. He is an abuser. I’ve seen them before, been there done that. I basically refused to back down, called him a pussy for  threatening minor children and helpless animals with weapons instead of trying to resolve the issue like a grown up. Then when I was good and ready, I walked off his property and reported his behavior to the cops. Who by the way majorly bungled the report. That moment began their retaliation against us and has nearly flattened us this holiday season.We figured the report would stop the threats and didn’t take it any further. We have kept close eyes on the kids and dogs as well as got rid of our pit bull on November1 because the poor thing was just not safe here anymore. No life for him to be constantly locked in the house for fear of being killed.

How could it get any worse? Well it does………..To be continued……….


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